When i was young , i used to be one of those people who decided that , if i ever had a wish , i would use it to wish for an infinite pool of wishes .

my first wish thereafter would be to wish that my wishes can only be used after uttering an activation word ; valar morghulis anybody ?

religious studies taught me to pray ; for forgiveness , guidance , and for what I really want . God knows best and he would answer my prayers if they were good and meant to be .

and so , my first prayer was to be a boy . i assumed, there was always a possibility i was wrongly misdiagnosed . my second was to be legibly wearing glasses . guess i thought they were cool at the time , but i thank my lucky stars now that that was never answered (though my eyesight isn't what it used to be) .

you can see that my childhood preconceptions were rather misguided .

i always had the idea i would end up marrying my cousin and i had this notion people live with their bestie if they don't get married ... i realize now that things are not so simple .

well , going back to my first prayer , older = more comfortable as a girl . but i admit , if i was given a choice of gender roles from the start , i would have never chosen to be a girl .

what with the gender typical roles and expectations .

some people still have the mindset that women were made to look good , cook , clean and give birth . it's a good thing that it's vastly lesser now , having come so far .

even when studying the bible , women are never lauded nor have any achievements worth mentioning . my studies are not extensive so forgive me if i err but so far that seems to be the case .

i believe i was made to be much more and i was never one for procreation .

okay , so it takes some spelling out to show how first world these problems are . but i just wanted a place to rant , so here you have it . till next time ! xoxo