ive got awhile till bedtime !

just realized my dinner will only be given 2hrs to digest before i go t sleep .
fattening much , bowl of rice no less :(
ate cupcake and tau sar pia today at self proclaimed teabreak @5 ~
tau sar pia is really tasty ! I like salted ones ~
wonder what food i should get tmr ~

im feeling cosy and relaxed , a prequel to sleep mode .
but hey here goes -

people around you always tell you that your perspective will change when you grow up and you'd see things differently . it's true in a sense , its more of childish thinking being remedied . But if you believe with all your heart that what you believe in is true , not childish , and you embrace that , you wont lose it , you wont change that part of yourself because you dont want it to be changed .


its not good to change too much , it could make you too cold or turn you into something shaped by others . of course if what you believe is sorely a mistake , i'd like you to change that please .

for myself , there are some changes , some good some bad .

for one , ive tried to overcome my adverse dislike for vegetables which is good in a way .
though i still dont eat them much and when i do the amount is almost negligable at times , i try !
ironically , the reason is because i'm trying to cut down on meat . as much as i like consuming meat , i like animals too so yeah . (i dont think im making much progress though)


And yup , ive become more forgiving .
dont get me wrong , im still quite petty , easily angered , but i forgive more , and more easily .


However i have also become a more selfish person .
maybe someday , someone might change that but not right now .

selfish because , when u go out of your way to be nice to someone , they either dont remember it , or take it for granted . that makes being nice redundant . not only that it makes being nice stupid . why go out of your way to be nice only for someone to step all over you .

me though , i still do appreciate people who are nice to me and i make it a point to reciprocrate . Only now i will wait to receive before giving , out of habit . Same as for feelings .


talking about feelings though ,
my analogy could be somewhat warped but youre welcome to listen .

developing feelings or starting a relationship is something akin to picking a puppy .
you may already have a preferred breed you're looking out for or there is just this one that catches your eye- even if it's not one of your preferred breeds , you know you'd get along just fine .
if that pup likes you back , you're almost all good to go .
it's easy and simple just like how i like it .
this is just imo . :)

Random ramblings .

Till next time . Sleepy ttm . zzz ~