is it really so hard, what i am hoping for.
will none of it ever be realized till the end..

im desperately holding on to everything that shows as though you still need me.
ive been sticking around and hurting,
knowing that you'll never be moved, not by me.
wondering why i havent given up yet..

and then again...

i know i wouldnt do it any other way.
i dont want to be tied down, i dont want to feel unease.
its funny, but your indifference always eats me no matter what i try.

as long as you are the one i love best, i dont want a relationship if its not you.
im tempted, but i believe this is the right choice.
there's no point in saying try when you know youre not ready.

still, there is a kind of balance when hes around
even though between him and me there just isnt..
enough like, enough secruity, enough trust..
it takes away the pain a little,
it was nice while it lasted :)
i know you were never the kind to take it slow.
if youve moved on,
all the best :]

its enough to know i wont have any regrets.
15 more days. i can do this on my own.


i hate the fact that when we finally end for good, you wont know how much you meant.